Chapter 1: Reality is worse than fiction
Reality is stranger than fiction.
“Is this a dream?”
Early in the morning, I opened my eyes to find I had become a woman.
And not just any woman, but one with small wings on her back and a shining halo floating above her head.
‘No matter how much they say reality is stranger than fiction, this is just too much.’
‘This must be, clearly and unequivocally, a dream with a 200% probability.’
“Hmm….”
‘A dream, huh.’
‘Since I’m aware that I’m dreaming.’
‘Perhaps I can think of this as having a lucid dream right now?’
‘I had always wanted to experience a lucid dream since I was young.’
‘Though I failed every time I tried.’
‘Even when I made all the preparations to have a lucid dream, I would only end up sleeping soundly.’
‘In that sense, this situation was incredibly exciting.’
‘To finally have a lucid dream.’
‘I’ve heard people can do almost anything in a lucid dream, so couldn’t I do it too?’
‘For example, like lifting that cup in front of me.’
“Hup!”
….
‘I guess it might not work.’
‘Come to think of it, I think I vaguely heard that you need to train to control lucid dreams properly.’
‘Just having a lucid dream is a huge step forward, so let’s not be too disappointed that I can’t do it.’
‘Yep.’
‘… Hup, hup.’
‘Just in case, I waved my hand at the cup a few times, but nothing changed.’
‘Yep, I’ll really give up now.’
‘Let’s look forward to next time.’
‘Hmm.’
‘Yes.’
‘What should I do.’
‘Still, this is the first lucid dream I’ve ever had in my life, and I don’t want to waste it away and then wake up.’
‘But now that I’m trying, I can’t think of anything to do.’
“Hmm.”
‘There’s a good method for times like this.’
‘Let’s just go outside for now.’
‘Something will probably happen then.’
‘It couldn’t be helped.’
‘None of the clothes fit.’
‘I tried to pick the smallest clothes I had, but I still ended up looking quite ridiculous.’
‘I think my height is about 140cm right now.’
‘My previous height was 165cm, so that’s a whole 25cm difference.’
‘So even if I wear the pants I used to wear, the legs are just way too long.’
‘Still, the pants are manageable since I can tighten them with a belt and make it work somehow.’
‘The problem is the shirt.’
….
‘Twitch, twitch.’
….
‘These small wings twitching behind my back.’
‘They’re quite cumbersome when I’m trying to put on a shirt.’
‘They’re only about the length of my forearm, but since they’re long horizontally, the shirt doesn’t go on easily.’
‘Still, the wings move as I wish, so if I fold them forward to wrap around my chest, I can put on a shirt, but it takes a surprising amount of effort.’
‘To make an analogy, it feels like wrapping my upper body with my arms.’
‘It’s not difficult, but it’s the kind of sensation that becomes tiring if I stay like this for a long time.’
‘It seems I can’t keep wearing clothes with my wings like this, so I need to find another way….’
‘Should I cut holes in the shirt?’
‘… Come to think of it, this is a dream.’
‘Who’s going to say anything if I cut a few holes in a shirt?’
‘Mhm. Maybe I’m more of a genius than I thought.’
‘As soon as I had that thought, I headed straight for the kitchen.’
‘I grabbed the kitchen scissors my mom bought me when I started living alone, and snip, snip.’
“Ooh….”
‘Perfect.’
‘The wings stick out of the holes perfectly.’
‘When I flap them as a test, they twitch cutely without getting caught on anything.’
‘Everyone, when an angel wears clothes, they wear them after cutting two holes in the back.’
‘My goodness, to think such a truth was hidden!’
….
‘Yep. Packed everything I need.’
‘Got all dressed.’
‘When I look in the mirror to check my appearance one last time, a 140cm tall child with long, bluish-silver hair is smiling goofily.’
‘To look like this in a dream, could it be that I have a subconscious desire to become a cute girl?’
‘It’s probably just because it’s a dream, right?’
‘Not some manifestation of my deep consciousness that I’m unaware of, or that my gender identity is actually female.’
‘It really means nothing, it’s just a dream.’
‘Hmm. That must be it.’
‘Because I’m not some pervert who wants to be a girl.’
….
‘… I’m not, right?’
‘Looking in the mirror, I feel my confidence wavering a bit.’
‘Alright, alright. Anyway.’
‘Wings, check.’
‘Halo, check.’
‘Hair, check.’
‘Clothes, check.’
‘The perfect outfit for a walk in a lucid dream.’
‘Mhm.’
‘Let’s go!’
The cool spring breeze blows gently.
Fortunately, it’s a day without any fine dust.
Under the brilliant rays of the sun, an angel was smiling goofily.
‘Yes. That’s me.’
‘There’s something strangely pleasant about the sunlight.’
‘I usually feel good when I go for a walk, but strangely, I feel twice as good today.’
“Hehe….”
Bathing in the sunlight shining down from the sky made me feel warm and drowsy, and I let out a silly laugh without realizing it.
‘I can’t believe lucid dreams feel this good….’
‘Even after I wake up, I want to have more lucid dreams if I can.’
A few minutes passed as I sat on a quiet park bench, sunbathing.
Beyond my elated mood, I could faintly hear the murmuring of people.
‘Is something going on?’
‘I’m curious, but this position is just too comfortable.’
‘Warm, happy… Mmm.’
‘Just five more minutes….’
“Hah!”
As I was dozing off like that, I was startled awake by a sudden feeling of falling.
After wiping the drool with my sleeve, the voices of the people became clear.
–Is that cosplay?
–How is she floating that ring?
–Wow, she’s so cute.
–I think the wings are moving?
–Is that a wig?
–Mom! Look at her! She’s an angel!
“Ehe…?”
A few seconds for my sleeping consciousness to surface.
A few seconds to look around.
Another few seconds to understand the situation.
By the time I realized what was happening after a booting process that took about a minute, I was already surrounded by quite a lot of people.
‘Uh, what do I do.’
Just as I was breaking into a cold sweat, wondering how to deal with this, my fully awakened reason reached a single truth.
‘Ah, right, it was a dream.’
‘Man, that really surprised me.’
‘To wake up and suddenly find so many people around me.’
Even though it’s a dream, it was still awkward to just stand in the center of all these gazes, so I casually got up and passed through the crowd of people.
‘Yes, yes. Goodbye, everyone.’
‘I, the master of this dream, will now leave this place in search of freedom—’
“Hya?!?”
‘—was what I was thinking, when a sensitive sensation from my back made me let out a sound that was, to anyone’s ears, extremely strange.’
“Ha, Hayun! You can’t just touch other people’s things!”
“Mom! That wing was super soft!!”
“Oh my, I’m so sorry. My daughter is very curious….”
Only after turning around and seeing the child, whose eyes were sparkling while being held by a woman, and who was rubbing her hands together as if to savor the lingering sensation, did I realize the full story of what had happened—that she had pulled on my wing.
“Ah, no. It’s alright. It’s fine. Kids can be like that.”
“Oh my, yes. Hayun, you need to apologize too!”
“Sowwy-!”
After accepting the apology from the little girl who bowed about 97 degrees and apologized loudly, I fled the park as if running away.
It was because my face was flushing from a sudden sense of embarrassment.
‘… This is a dream, right?’
‘That sensation just now, no matter how I think about it, seemed far from being a dream…?’
‘No, that’s not it.’
‘It’s a more realistic guess that the sensations in a lucid dream were just extremely, dramatically realistic, rather than me actually becoming an angel with a halo and wings upon waking up.’
‘Mhm. So this is a dream.’
‘It has to be a dream.’
‘It’s a dream!’
I shouted the words to no one in particular in my mind and quickened my pace towards home.
Even though I knew it was a dream, I was embarrassed to stay outside like this.
When I first came outside, the smaller body felt new and fascinating, which was nice, but in this situation, I resented my shrunken body for its shorter stride.
Was it because I had noticed it once?
The stares of the people, which I hadn’t noticed when I left the house, began to feel blatant.
‘Ugh, I feel so embarrassed for some reason.’
I put on a spurt of speed and headed home faster, and when I finally arrived, I slammed the door shut with a loud bang!
“Hah, hah….”
I calmed my rapidly beating heart from the hurried run, and lay down on the bed, pleading to wake up quickly.
It was definitely a new and fun dream, but now I was starting to want to wake up.
Part of it was because I was embarrassed for showing myself like that.
‘Mhm.’
‘Alright, it’s time to wake up now.’
I closed both my eyes and regulated my breathing.
‘Now, after falling into the black swamp of consciousness, when I open my eyes, my original room will come into view.’
‘My original body will be there too.’
‘Mhm.’
The feeling of the soft, fluffy bed.
The soft blanket.
The drowsiness that gradually came over me as my tense body relaxed.
My eyelids, drooping shut.
And the warm sunlight shining in from beyond the window…
‘Ah, let’s move the curtains.’
‘I want to feel more of the sunlight.’
Swish!
As I drew the curtains, the sunlight brightly illuminated my bleak studio apartment.
The yellow sunlight shone gently on the bed, enveloping me….
“Hehe….”
‘It feels good.’
Before I knew it, I had forgotten my goal of waking up and was focusing on basking in the warm sunlight.
Smiling foolishly, I moved closer to the window.
‘Mmm, at this rate, I might as well go outside and sunbathe—’
Ding-dong!
“Ehe?”
Hearing the doorbell from outside, I let out a silly sound and looked towards the door.
And then came the voice of an unknown man.
“Excuse me, we’re from the National Intelligence Service.”
‘Huh?’